What do I believe in?

I posted this 15 years ago and I still find it instructional

This morning (January 20, 2009)  I had a conversation with God.  And He asked me a very important question.  What do I believe more in, his redemptive work in me or my ability to fail.  I must confess that all too often I lean to the latter.  I almost seem to reject that notion that Jesus has paid the price so that my failures are not as important as I would make them out to be.  Jesus paid for my sins so I wouldn't have to keep reminding myself of them.  I have a bad habit of recounting all of my past failures and using them as a gauge of how I will do in the future.  This completely negates what Christ has done for me. OR I try and when I fail, I find myself saying, "See I'll just screw it up!"  Yet Christ already knew where I would fall.  He already knew what I needed to overcome when he offered me salvation.  I guess that is what grace is about.  Not the freedom to sin, but the hope that when I do sin that I can get up again and continue to follow Christ.  There is only one unforgivable sin, and I see no need to ever go there, so my challenge is to trust that He will complete the work in me and the greater is He who is in me then all my past failures.  Christ doesn't remind me of my sin, he just says go and stop sinning.  But I think he knows that we are still human.  We get angry, we feel sorry for ourselves, we have selfish moments.  But what are we going to be defined by our failures or our Hope in Him. 

Today I choose to put my hope in Him afresh.  I acknowledge that I am human, but I choose to live for Him, because he has saved me.  He has given me the promise of eternal life and the seal of the Holy Spirit.  It is not I who lives, but Christ in me.

Amen